Ask the Experts: First Dances

Marta Block


Question: What order should my first dances go in?

A: As with most wedding "rules" nothing is set in stone, but this is the generally expected and accepted order of events.

  1. The bride and groom dance to "their song."
  2. Then the bride and her father dance. A few seconds after they have started to dance, the groom asks the bride's mother to dance.
  3. The groom's father can cut in on the groom and mother of the bride, and then the groom asks his own mother to dance.
  4. Eventually, everyone switches back to their proper partner. The band leader or DJ signifies that these symbolic dances are over by announcing "Sue and John invite you to join them on the dance floor." This is the signal for guests to begin dancing.

If you have a complicated family situation (for example, multiple parents), you may wish to make only the bride and groom's dance a stand-alone event. During the dance, or after the dance, the DJ or band leader should invite others to join you on the dance floor. If you wish to delay the "featured" dances until later in the evening, the DJ can begin the reception with the announcement that the bride and groom invite everyone to the dance floor.